???

maniacal, insensitive desires,
it does not matter how one sees it,
but must one really think that it is worth it?
why does one really desire such things?

why must we continue these selfish, greedy desires?
why must we live among these people?
reality is bringing us down into the depths of hell,
while at the same time,
reality has given us a dose of what hell feels like on earth.

whether it's good or bad,
we're always going to live with such unneeded desires.

i don't know what came over me awhile ago, i was making myself upset, and sad. i don't know what to think or say, i just want to be held. i never really met my real grandparents. i don't know what to say, or how i should act around elders. i miss my grandparents. i'm scared to dye being a lonely person, a lonely person who doesn't have any love ones anymore. i'm scared of that thought. i'm scared to think of so many things, all i want to do is close my eyes and sleep. but i feel as if i go to sleep, i'll have a nightmare of something scary. this is stupid, isn't it? yeah.. it is.

thanks for reading anyways. glad you cared to even check my blog out anyways.